I have this strange habit of taking the photographs I need to create an image and then storing them away in a “to-do” folder on my hard drive until I am either practically, technically or emotionally ready to create the image I envisioned with them. In many instances these files can brew in that “to-do” folder for as long as two to three years!
Then, as if by some strange magic, I get a feeling when these images are ready to be processed. Or perhaps it is more a question of when I am ready to deal with the emotions and story within the image. Either way, there is a little voice inside that lets me know when the time is right. It is a voice that has never failed me, and so I have learnt to trust it completely.
Not all my images end up in the “to-do” folder, as some are processed and shared rather quickly. However, this image spent two years there. I took the main photographs to create this image in March 2015, but only started to work on them in March 2017. Although in this case it was mostly for practical reasons, as I needed to find the necessary prop and create some stock to complete the image.
I was inspired to create this image, well the one I had originally planned, at the time I had made the decision to resign from my job that I had held for over 12 years. I was scared and sad, but also excited and grateful. The image was to express and celebrate these emotions, as well as a letting go of the hurt and fear I had been feeling.
I eventually created the stock I had initially intended for this image in late 2016. Yet something was still keeping me back. That little voice inside had not confirmed it was ready. So I waited, until March 2017 when I got the unmistakable feeling that it was time to work on this image. Yet strangely enough, at the same time I was browsing through some of my photographs from my 2016 Europe travels and came across this photograph of a lamppost…
I photographed this lamppost while I was on my way to the Tate Modern Museum in London. I immediately saw its potential and so I took this photograph specifically to use as stock. If that did not work, then I thought I could at least use it as inspiration to create my own crown. I tried to get as close as my position and lens would allow, but was also very aware of the lighting and angel. I also made sure I got as close as possible to one that had clouds in the background and also waited for the sun to go behind the clouds so as not to have any sharp light on it.
The most amazing thing was that the angel, lighting and size of the crown fitted on my head with only the slightest tweaking. Clearly it was meant to be :) And this story was far more powerful and empowering to me than I initially envisioned. Following my heart and becoming queen of my own kingdom.